In a loving relationship though, is codependence such a bad thing? A long, happy and loving relationship often has respectful codependence at its roots, IMHO.
I can think of my late parents, my late in-laws and friends and relations who have been married forever to the one person and there is a mutual dependence there which looks like two halves making the whole soul. I've been contentedly married for 47 years and yet a psychologist told me I am codependent as if it were a sin. I decided I really didn't care because it felt good and right.
Thank you for commenting...That's a great observation and opportunity to clarify a point.
There are benefits to a reasonable degree of codependence in a mutually loving relationship. And I think it only makes sense. Consider the question: "Is other people's approval important to you?" If they're someone whom you respect (and is deserving of that respect) then of course their opinion is important!
It's only when one starts putting the other person's needs/wants first (and by doing so they are harming themselves or the other person in some way) that codependency devolves into something destructive.
This brief article explains the benefits of codependency when it isn't taken to extremes.
Interesting set of questions.
In a loving relationship though, is codependence such a bad thing? A long, happy and loving relationship often has respectful codependence at its roots, IMHO.
I can think of my late parents, my late in-laws and friends and relations who have been married forever to the one person and there is a mutual dependence there which looks like two halves making the whole soul. I've been contentedly married for 47 years and yet a psychologist told me I am codependent as if it were a sin. I decided I really didn't care because it felt good and right.
Thank you for commenting...That's a great observation and opportunity to clarify a point.
There are benefits to a reasonable degree of codependence in a mutually loving relationship. And I think it only makes sense. Consider the question: "Is other people's approval important to you?" If they're someone whom you respect (and is deserving of that respect) then of course their opinion is important!
It's only when one starts putting the other person's needs/wants first (and by doing so they are harming themselves or the other person in some way) that codependency devolves into something destructive.
This brief article explains the benefits of codependency when it isn't taken to extremes.
https://bit.ly/3KCSqaR
Great link and thank you.
I think ultimately the question that stirred me was yours - 'Is other people's approval important to you?'
I think there's a whole newsletter's value there and I think you are just the person to write it. Thank you for both your newsletter and reply.
Cheers.